Sunday, December 18, 2011

Hima Himalaya


No cartoon today, but a new composition featuring some crow and an other bird which were singing in the tree in front of my house this morning.
I initially called the composition Himalaya, which is kind of lame, I know. Will try to find something else next time.
Guitar + electronics played by myself.
Don't know the name of the crow - will ask him next time I hear him.

Tuesday, December 13, 2011

Elusive Higgs Boson glimpsed !

So today's news is that the Higgs Boson may have been 'glimpsed' !

Imprimatür, thanks to one of our incredibly nosy reporter is able to give you an exclusive report about the elusive Higgs Boson.
Our reporter not only glimpsed the boson but even took a picture of it as it was hiding behind a scientist who had been searching for it for years.
Later on, our reporter managed to convince the boson to meet him in a nearby local pub to get more information about its elusive nature. The boson, who preferred to talk on condition of anonymity,  was initially reluctant to talk but after two bottoms up, turned into a laid back and easy going elementary particle.
The boson said: "dunno what these guys are doing. I've been watching them scratching their heads for years, and I was just standing behind and they never saw me ! Completely blind these scientists ! I guess I'll have an other drink now".
When our reporter returned to the table with two shots of tequila, true to its elusive reputation, the boson was no longer there.
Our reporter drank the two shots and pondered what to do with his life..

All these years searching and it was hiding behind !
Some information about the Large Hadron Collider

Monday, December 12, 2011

Frankenstein's Monster

The path to success is often scattered with obstacles 
A quick one drawn at work today.
Of course, Victor Frankenstein - who was not even a doctor - never designed his creature to be a monster and totally disowned his creation when it came to life. So please forgive me for taking liberties with the original story.
Please read Frankenstein's Monster for more info.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Le jour 540

Albert est quelque peu incrédule après 540 jours de tergiversations...

(AFP/Reuters) C'est donc bien vrai, après seulement 540 jours de tergiversations, la Belgique a enfin un gouvernement !
Elio s'est tout de suite rendu chez Albert, qui s'appretait à prendre son bain royal, pour lui annoncer la bonne nouvelle.

ps: Je ne sais pas si vous avez remarqué, mais Albert porte des caleçons a coeur. Cela n'a bien sur aucun impact sur les institutions de la Belgique, mais cela valait la peine d'être mentionné.


Saturday, December 3, 2011

Annihilation by misplaced tweet


One misplaced tweet and you're annihilated

In these modern times, social networks are an effective way to convey very publicly your opinion about something or someone.
Yeah, that's a good sentence. I'll keep it.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Is the placebo effect working on cats ?

So today's question is: Is the placebo effect working on cats ?
I confirm that it indeed works and here's a faithful account of a story which happened with my cat a few years ago (some dramatisation added).


A proof that cats fall for the placebo effect


Saturday, November 19, 2011

Cat studies I

Studying cats - part 1 
Today is dedicated to studying cats. All inspired by none other than my in house cat.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Electrokitsch I

No cartoon for this post but instead some music that I composed recently.

Ingredients contained in Electrokistch:
  • some synthesized sounds and sounds generated using techniques developed during the last century
  • 2 drum loops + 4 drum fills 
  • 1 tambourine loop
  • bass
  • 1 choir sample
  • syrupy flute
  • oh yes, and also some piano

Thursday, October 20, 2011

One has to always wait a little for Namma Metro


One has to always wait a little
For the train to come
It might be delayed by hours, days or years
Any inconvenience will be deeply regretted


Two friends are talking about random things. 
I don't know where they are, and what their names are. 
Please don't ask me because as I mentioned in the line above, I don't know.


- so finally today is the day !
- the day of what dude ?
- the day Namma Metro, which mean "Our Metro" in Kannada,  is officially starting its commercial operations here in Bangalore . This has been quite a long wait.
- delays ? what do you expect from a public transport ? one has to always wait some time for a train or a bus to arrive, otherwise that would be too perfect and, I would even risk, would instill a sense of deep anguish as it would disturb that delicate balance that we are so comfortable with. Not to mention that our internal clocks which account for these delays would have to be reprogrammed.
- Yes, but it's becoming a bit too much for my taste. You know, they missed a few deadlines for the first phase. First these guys said that it would start in March 2010, then promised it for December 31st 2010 and then said it would be in April 2011 for sure and then they claimed that it would definitely be on September 25th 2011. Of course it didn't happen, this time because Manmohan was in New York for the UN general assembly and hence couldn't inaugurate it. They finally declared that 20 October would be the date - 100% definitely guaranteed.
- By "they" you  mean some politicians ? These politicians, even if they had announced it for the Greek calends, you could be sure that it would eventually come one day. What do you expect from them ? deliver on their promises ? One has to always have a feeling of being taken for a ride by politicians - he he a good one when we are talking about public transport no ? - otherwise that would be too perfect and, I would even risk, would instill a sense of deep anguish as it would disturb that delicate balance that we are so comfortable with. Not to mention that we would really have to start thinking about who to vote in the next elections since it would now actually make a difference.

And then the two friends suddenly part ways. Not sure where they went after that. Please don't ask as I don't know.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Monday, September 26, 2011

The hanging philosophers

Some philosophers have a tendency to hang
Don't try to comprehend
These are just three guys hanging
And they happen to be philosophers
They could have been bakers, jugglers or blacksmiths
But they are not
They are just philosophers
And they are hanging
That's all

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Teenage neutrinos and the art of deceit

Lying is second nature for teenage neutrinos
So some neutrinos have broken the speed limit ? No worries, after some reeducation they'll come back on the right track.
On a side note and totally unrelated, when I was in kindergarten I used to draw human beings without a body - just the limbs attached to the head. I felt that there was something strange but couldn't point exactly to what was wrong.

Why did some neutrinos break the speed limit ?

Neutrinos always have lame excuses to justify their reckless driving

Saturday, September 24, 2011

The unquenchable thirst for knowledge

The thirst for knowledge doesn't leave you until after you breathe your last

Friday, September 23, 2011

Near death experiences



We hear a lot about near death experiences but we've never actually seen any of these so called "close death encounters".
Now, here's an exclusive scoop from Imprimatuur: for the first time, I can show you some impressive photographs of near death experiences. Beware, these are not photoshoped  (or maybe slightly edited to adjust the contrast) and might come as a shock for some of you. If you are not comfortable looking at these photographs, please leave this page and have a look at How Stuff Works instead. You've been warned.

A case of near death experience (actual photo, no photoshop)


An other case of near death experience (actual photo, no photoshop)

Thursday, September 22, 2011

The Fear of public speaking

Death is no longer number one 
We had an interesting session at work about presentation skills and believe it or not, apparently polls suggest that the fear of speaking in public is more powerful than the fear of death !
I guess these guys probably never experienced death before. So much for the instinct of self preservation !



Monday, September 19, 2011

Latin de cuisine

Le chef cuistot du Vatican sanctionne toutes les allocutions Urbi et Orbi

Sunday, September 18, 2011

The Birds

They said: "The Birds"
Hey, I'm a bird !
So what 
?
Newly released archives show that some unexpected candidates showed up at the casting of Hitchcock's "The Birds" .

Saturday, September 17, 2011

Dracula tries his luck in the CG industry

A solid cv and you're in !

It's a known fact, lighters dread direct sunlight.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

How to draw Rajinikanth - a methodical approach




Rajinikanth
This blog has a statistics counter so that I know how often people access it, and from where. The counter also reports the referral which is the link from where people came, such as search engines. 
In the past months, the top searches which lead to my blog has been "How to draw Rajinikanth" and similar. People would then land on one of my previous posts: Rajinikanth, the man who can auto draw himself.
Since so many people are interested in drawing the celebrity, I though I would add my contribution to this noble cause.

So how to draw Rajinikanth ?

There are exactly two approaches:
  • As mentioned in Rajinikanth, the man who can auto draw himself, you can wait until your blank sheet of paper gets auto drawn by none other than Rajinikanth. Although a valid solution, it is not that practical since you might need to wait a long time, and the result might be unpredictable as the star will draw himself as he wants it, depending on his mood. Not much artistic control, I concede
  • The other solution is to follow the diagram below. It is a systematic approach and if you follow the arrows scrupulously, you'll end up with a Rajinikanth drawn by none other than yourself !
So arm yourself with patience or a pencil and good luck !

(Click to enlarge, unless you have a rajinikanthesque hyper vision)
The sure way to draw Rajinikanth

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Lokpal Bill


During these last months, India has witnessed a lot of activity regarding the adoption of the Lokpal bill meant to fight the rampant corruption affecting public life. A campaign by social activists headed by Anna Hazare is pushing for a Jan lokpal bill or citizens' ombudsman bill - which is supposed to have more teeth to fight and deter corruption by calling among other things to get the prime minister and the higher judiciary within the ambit of the law.

To put pressure on the government, Anna Hazare had started an indefinite fast which he eventually stopped after the Lok sabha (parliament) gave its approval on key elements of the Jan Lokpal bill.
However, not everybody aggrees with Anna Hazare who has been hastily branded as the new Gandhi by a section of the media . His critics, who includes among others Aruna Roy, the National Campaign for People's Right to Information (NCPRI) or Arundhati Roy, argue that the proposed draconian bill will not be effective, is undemocratic, oppressive and populist in spirit and that its exact judicial powers are not clear (in its current form). The bill is also opposed by the All-India Confederation of SC/ST Organisations, representing the Dalits and backward castes who say that Anna Team’s demands are extra constitutional and undemocratic and feel that this movement is against the system of reservation. Here's an article from the organisation about the Jan Lokpal

Here are two articles published in The Hindu:




Anybody here ?

Well, what can I say ? I left this blog unattended for some time now, I mean three little months.
I must say that I don't have any excuse as I had plenty of time to update it.
Don't know what happened.
Maybe I was just too lazy.
Yes, that's probably that, absolute laziness.


Monday, June 6, 2011

What really happened in the Situation Room ?

Watching a classified episode of The Simpsons can be a nerve racking experience 
So you're wondering what's the real story behind the famous May 1st situation room photo ?
No, it was not taken during a live broadcast of some Navy semi aquatic mammals storming a compound where Bin Laden was hiding.
What really happened is that a top secret episode of The Simpsons was secretly broadcast in the Situation Room and that the photo was taken at particularly intense moment where Homer Simpson was about to commit some (classified) action.
Marcel, a big fan of The Simpsons, was actually present that day and is seen and heard letting his emotions speak in this unedited and non-muted photograph.
The security protocol of the White House requires that photos must be edited to remove any element that could compromise national security before their release.
The exhaustive list to date is the following:

- Classified documents whose level ranges from restricted to top secret
- Nuclear secret codes (unless they consist of less than 2 digits)
- Sounds and voices
- Acne on top officials' noses
- Pizza delivery man
- Rats (thus Marcel absence in the official photograph)
- Playboy magazines
- Beer bottles
- Cannabis joints

So now that one is an unknown that you now know !
Now you'll ask: how did I get the unedited photograph ?
I'm really sorry but I cannot tell you that now !

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Apparition d'un Marcel à l'air Incrédule au Dessus d'un Vieux Parchemin Estampillé sur Fond Diffus

"Apparition d'un Marcel à l'air Incrédule au Dessus d'un Vieux Parchemin Estampillé sur Fond Diffus"
(huile d'arachide sur papier wc 24x24x24 cm)
Dans la série "Badigeonnage de toile sur escabeau", notre ami Marcel a cette fois-ci commis une nouvelle catastrophe artistique avec élément autobiographique intitulée: "Apparition d'un Marcel à l'air Incrédule au Dessus d'un Vieux Parchemin Estampillé sur Fond Diffus".
Comme le titre parle de lui-même, je ne m'étendrai pas d'avantage en commentaires inutiles .

Friday, June 3, 2011

Rajinikanth, the man who can auto draw himself

Rajinikanth, in a rare unfinished auto drawing.
I shouldn't have signed it because I only provided the background.
It's the drawing of Rajnikanth which did the drawing
Rajinikanth is an Indian film actor and a superstar of Tamil cinema. He comes from a modest background and did various jobs, including working as a bus conductor in Bangalore, before making his way into Tamil cinema. Over the years, he has become hugely popular, not least because of his larger than life super hero characters.
There's a flurry of jokes about Rajinikanth describing his prowesses.
For example:
- Rajinikanth doesn’t wear a watch. He decides what time it is.
- Rajinikanth did in fact, build Rome in a day.
- Rajinikanth can divide by zero
- Rajinikanth knows which came first, the egg or the chicken.
- etc.

Rajinikanth has also a fascinating ability which is rarely mentioned: the fact that he can auto draw himself on a sheet of paper - out of the blue !
So if you are lucky, you could witness your blank sheet of paper suddenly being filled by strokes (he usually uses China ink): it's a drawing of Rajinikanth drawing himself !
Obscurantists will of course ask: but who started to draw the hand in the drawing which is drawing the drawing ?
It's a typical chicken and egg biryani problem. As stated above, Rajinikanth knows which came first. And this is not a joke.

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Badigeonnage de toile sur escabeau

Marcel en pleine action
Pendant son temps libre, Marcel s'adonne à l'une de ses activités favorites: le badigeonnage de toile sur escabeau.
Je ne sais pas ce qu'il fait de ses toiles une fois terminées, je lui demanderai la prochaine fois que je le vois au bistro.

Saturday, May 28, 2011

A soporific property of cubic NURBS surfaces

 
Cubic NURBS surface are ideal for a good nap
In my last post where I casually mentioned NURBS surfaces (causing a great deal of boredom), I completely forgot to say a word on one of the most useful and probably least advertised properties of these surfaces (specifically the cubic ones): they are absolutely ideal for a good nap !
I won't bother to show you the proof, just look at the equations, which speak for themselves.
I'll go take a nap now.
See you later

Friday, May 27, 2011

Modeling for Mr. NuRBS

People with modeling experience can apply
Without entering into nauseating details, in computed graphics, NURBS designate a mathematical model to generate and represent curves and surf... ok I can feel that you're already bored aren't you ?
Ok, in case you want to learn more about Non Uniform Rational B-Spline (which is what NURBS stands for, in case you're vaguely interested, which I doubt, given the expression of boredom illuminating your face), you can read more here.
Lame jokes apart, it must be said that the cg industry (which is how is confidentially called the industry making all these funny 3d animated movies) needs good artists for their modeling departments (no, not the catwalk stuff, I mean modeling/sculpting). So if you feel like joining an animation studio, send them your cv along with some sculptures of yours for evaluation. Good luck !

Monday, May 23, 2011

A typical day in Kabini

Kabini dwellers go through a lot of stress
I was in Kabini.
I just saw some peacocks.
That's all.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Inside the Large Hadron Collider

This undated photograph shows distressed hadrons just before the collision 
The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) is a gigantic particle accelerator of 27km in circumference, located under ze franco-swiss border near Geneva. It was built by the Conseil Européen pour la Recherche Nucléaire (CERN) or European Organization for Nuclear Research.
The principle of the collider is to accelerate two beams of particles (hadrons) with powerful magnetic fields to close to the speed of light (without attracting the cops attention, that's why it's done clandestinely 175 m underground), before colliding them.
These experiment will help to elucidate questions that the Standard Model is failing to explain. These questions are for example: what is the origin of mass ? Does the elusive Higgs Boson - supposed to 'provide' mass to other particles - exist ? or what is the nature of dark matter and dark energy which make 96% of the universe ?
Some obscurantists claim that there's a risk that the LHC might generate a black hole when it will run at full power. If it indeed happens, no one will be there to say: "these damn obscurantists were right this time".
For more info, please check the Large Hadron Collider website

All these years searching and it was hiding behind !

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Black Holes: theory and practical advice

A picosecond after finalising a black hole theory
Black holes are these singular cosmic oddities which are so dense that they collapse on themselves and attract everything in their vicinity. Even photons, no matter what their confession or wavelength are, cannot escape (that's why some smart ass has appropriately named them black holes). Because of their sheer gravitational force, their inner core is a bizarre place where time and space are not quite the same notions as the ones you are used to, and expect to find, when you go to your local grocery shop or even to the local pub.

Now after the theory, some practical advice.
What to do when threatened by a black hole ?
  • stay calm
  • don't engage in any conversation and keep your distances. They are pervert cosmic thugs
  • don't accept candies
  • throw some photons to buy some time
  • don't look at the black hole directly, first because they are susceptible and second because you won't see anything
  • a proven technique to confuse black holes is to ask them the question "What time is it ?". This will throw them in a state of deep Heisenbergian uncertainty and will leave you a certain time to escape.
Hope these advices will be useful.
Happy intergalactic journey !

Early Art

Early Art
Example of a paleolithic painting found in the Lascaux caves. For some reasons, these paintings were never shown to the public.

Saturday, April 30, 2011

Six mois après l’avoir engagé comme directeur de campagne, Sarko se rend compte que Marcel s'est foutu de sa gueule !


Ce sont bientôt les élections présidentielles en France. Grâce à une entourloupe dont lui seul a le secret, Marcel a réussi à se faire engager comme directeur de campagne de Sarkozy, ce dernier s'accrochant au pouvoir tel un vieux dictateur décrépit.

En fin stratège, Marcel lui a vendu le slogan: "Votez Sarkozy: casse-toi pauv’ con !” décrit par Marcel comme un appel au bon sens du peuple français pour reconduire l’Homme Providentiel afin que tous les pauvres cons et autres réfractaires au progrès se cassent.
Il va sans dire que Sarko, dont l'égo s’émoustille pour un rien, a immédiatement embrassé le slogan ingénieux, d'autant plus qu'il emprunte généreusement à la panoplie d’expectorations bien reniflées de sa Seigneurie.

Après six mois de campagne, Sarko, énergumène à la ponctuation peu raffinée et au sens du discernement proche du zéro absolu est finalement alerté par une taupe et se rend compte que Marcel s'est bien foutu de sa gueule.
Marcel, dans un coup de génie a subrepticement subtilisé le slogan original:
"Votez Sarkozy: casse-toi pauv’ con !”
par un homonyme mais pas pour autant synonyme:
"Votez: Sarkozy casse-toi pauv’ con !”
Ce dernier signifiant simplement que Sarkozy, qui est tout de même un pauvre con, devrait songer à se casser.

Très fort Marcel !

Tuesday, April 26, 2011

Beware of imitations !

No one will be fooled !

In India, Sri Sathya Sai Baba the spiritual leader just passed away this last Sunday. It is a big shock for the millions who followed him or appreciated his dedication and engagement in charitable activities, educational institutions or healthcare. Here's today's The Hindu editorial on Sai Baba

Saturday, April 9, 2011

An undocumented rule of cricket: the run over

Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is cricket. There are rules.

Friday, April 8, 2011

Casse-toi pauv' con !

La pitié, en direct 

Poursuivant sa tournée internationale, Marcel a récemment fait escale à l'Élysée.
En sonnant, un petit teigneux dégoulinant de hargne a entrouvert la porte et lui a lancé ces paroles: "Kess' tu veux toi ?"
Interloqué, stupéfait, mais pas pour autant désarçonné, notre ami Marcel a répondu courtoisement qu'il était venu voir sa triste majesté afin de lui présenter un cahier de doléances chargé.
Lui coupant aussitôt la parole, le petit teigneux s'est emporté et lui a vomi un graveleux "Casse-toi pauv' con !".
Marcel l'a regardé un instant d'un air confondu et un sentiment de pitié l'a envahi peu à peu. Il a alors rebroussé chemin et s'est ensuite installé à une terrasse pour lire son petit journal et boire son café crème.

Wednesday, April 6, 2011

Trio of Agents Ex, Why and Zed

In this confidential and undated photo: agents Ex, Why and also Zed
Here are agents Ex, Why and also Zed, from the Underground Intelligence Agency.
You'll ask me: "What's that Underground Intelligence Agency business ? I'll give a answer : I do not know.

Not much is known about the Agency. What are its activities ? Who is the Agency working for ? Does the Agency know you ? Do the agents themselves know who they are working for ? Do they know themselves ? All these are questions which will probably remain forever unanswered.
Of course such a thick veil of secrecy will likely tickle people's imagination and lead to a considerable amount of grotesque speculation. It is said for instance that the mere fact of mentioning the Agency agents' names in a public space, whatever the medium used (eg: a blog) directly attracts the Agency's wrath and that the offender is never seen again in his or her original form.
Of course all this is pure fantasy and ... oh wait, someone is knocking at the

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Marcel meets Barak Obama

In this undated photo, Marcel meets Obama at the White House in the oval office
(AFP/Reuter) During a recent international tour, Marcel paid a visit to Barak Obama, the president of some state vaguely situated to the south of Canada.
Not much transpired from the meeting except that some mysterious paperwork took place. Marcel was in a hurry as he had to catch a flight. He didn't have time to stay for lunch despite Obama telling him that he had prepared some pasta, which is Marcel's ultimate favorite. He promised to stay longer the next time, provided of course that the pasta is cooked al dente.
End of report.

Monday, April 4, 2011

Objectif Nuls: ou comment sortir la Belgique de l'impasse institutionelle

Sur ce cliché non daté, Marcel expose une de ces 'Bon sang mais c'est bien sûr !' de solution


Après être allé manger une frite avec Albert pour lui remonter le moral, Marcel lui expose son plan ingénieux pour sortir la Belgique de l'impasse institutionnelle dans laquelle elle se trouve: envoyer tous les politiciens sur la Lune.
Embarqués à bord d'une fusée 100% belge équipée d'une friteuse, fournie en cageots de bière et bien achalandée en politiciens de toutes confessions sur lequels ils pourront se défouler, ils n'en faudra pas plus pour occuper ces tristes élus et enfin avoir la paix.
Bon sang mais c'est bien sûr ! c'est la Pax Luna !

Sunday, April 3, 2011

Marcel et le Roy des Belges

Ce cliché non daté montre Marcel en prise avec le désespoir royal

Albert semble bien déprimé après tous ces mois passés à recevoir ces formateurs, informateurs, réformateurs, saboteurs, discutailleurs, tergiversateurs et autres incapables. Heureusement que Marcel est là pour lui remonter le moral. Il n'y a rien de mieux qu'une bonne frite pour se remettre de ses émotions institutionnelles.
Sauce andalouse ? Non peut-être ? Avec une pintje bien entendu !

Technology Aided Bowling (TAB)

Undocumented Law28.2#1 from the Laws of Cricket
So yesterday was the grand finale of the cricket World Cup and India won ! Bravo India !
People celebrated with an explosion of joy and of course firecrackers. Although I'm not interested in cricket, I'm happy for India and all my friends here. Bravo !