What to do when threatened by a Black Hole?

Black holes are these singular cosmic oddities which are so dense that they collapse on themselves and attract everything in their vicinity. Even photons, no matter what their confession or wavelength are, cannot escape. Because of their sheer gravitational force, their inner core is a bizarre place where time and space are not quite the same notions as the ones you are used to, and expect to find, when you go to your local grocery shop or even to the local pub.

Now after the theory, some practical advice...

What to do when threatened by a black hole ?

• stay calm
• don't engage in any conversation and keep your distances. They are pervert cosmic thugs
• don't accept candies
• throw some photons to buy some time
• don't look at the black hole directly, first because they are susceptible and second because you won't see anything
• a proven technique to confuse black holes is to ask them the question "What time is it ?". This will throw them in a state of deep Heisenbergian uncertainty and will leave you a certain time to escape.

Hope these advices will be useful.
Happy intergalactic journey !

Had obscurantism prevailed, the Earth would still be flat

I originally drew this cartoon with the title: Had Galileo not existed, the Earth would still be flat.
After I posted it, some enlightened readers, rightly pointed out that it's the Egyptians who determined that the Earth was round and calculated its circumference, a few thousand years before Galileo's great grand parents met.
I've learnt a lesson here and should have verified my facts before posting.

Going to the Moon (2)

Another of my old cartoons that I revisited and am republishing with my imprimatur.

Newton and the Hippotree

Fatal Attraction

Why do bats hang upside down ?

We finally learn why bats hang upside down with this exclusive interview by National Geographic.

Elusive Higgs Boson glimpsed !

So today's news is that the Higgs Boson may have been 'glimpsed' !

Imprimatür, thanks to one of our incredibly nosy reporter is able to give you an exclusive report about the elusive Higgs Boson.
Our reporter not only glimpsed the boson but even took a picture of it as it was hiding behind a scientist who had been searching for it for years.
Later on, our reporter managed to convince the boson to meet him in a nearby local pub to get more information about its elusive nature. The boson, who preferred to talk on condition of anonymity,  was initially reluctant to talk but after two bottoms up, turned into a laid back and easy going elementary particle.
The boson said: "dunno what these guys are doing. I've been watching them scratching their heads for years, and I was just standing behind and they never saw me ! Completely blind these scientists ! I guess I'll have an other drink now".
When our reporter returned to the table with two shots of tequila, true to its elusive reputation, the boson was no longer there.
Our reporter drank the two shots and pondered what to do with his life..

All these years searching and it was hiding behind !

Some information about the Large Hadron Collider

Neutrino grilled by scientists

Tough grilling by scientists panel.

Teenage neutrinos and the art of deceit

Lying is second nature for teenage neutrinos

So some neutrinos have broken the speed limit ? No worries, after some reeducation they'll come back on the right track.
On a side note and totally unrelated, when I was in kindergarten I used to draw human beings without a body - just the limbs attached to the head. I felt that there was something strange but couldn't point exactly to what was wrong.

Why did some neutrinos break the speed limit ?

Neutrinos always have lame excuses to justify their reckless driving

Inside the Large Hadron Collider

This undated photograph shows distressed hadrons just before the collision 

The Large Hadron Collider (LHC) is a gigantic particle accelerator of 27km in circumference, located under ze franco-swiss border near Geneva. It was built by the Conseil Européen pour la Recherche Nucléaire (CERN) or European Organization for Nuclear Research.
The principle of the collider is to accelerate two beams of particles (hadrons) with powerful magnetic fields to close to the speed of light (without attracting the cops attention, that's why it's done clandestinely 175 m underground), before colliding them.
These experiment will help to elucidate questions that the Standard Model is failing to explain. These questions are for example: what is the origin of mass ? Does the elusive Higgs Boson - supposed to 'provide' mass to other particles - exist ? or what is the nature of dark matter and dark energy which make 96% of the universe ?
Some obscurantists claim that there's a risk that the LHC might generate a black hole when it will run at full power. If it indeed happens, no one will be there to say: "these damn obscurantists were right this time".
For more info, please check the Large Hadron Collider website

All these years searching and it was hiding behind !

Black Holes: theory and practical advice

A picosecond after finalising a black hole theory

Black holes are these singular cosmic oddities which are so dense that they collapse on themselves and attract everything in their vicinity. Even photons, no matter what their confession or wavelength are, cannot escape (that's why some smart ass has appropriately named them black holes). Because of their sheer gravitational force, their inner core is a bizarre place where time and space are not quite the same notions as the ones you are used to, and expect to find, when you go to your local grocery shop or even to the local pub.

Now after the theory, some practical advice.
What to do when threatened by a black hole ?

• stay calm
• don't engage in any conversation and keep your distances. They are pervert cosmic thugs
• don't accept candies
• throw some photons to buy some time
• don't look at the black hole directly, first because they are susceptible and second because you won't see anything
• a proven technique to confuse black holes is to ask them the question "What time is it ?". This will throw them in a state of deep Heisenbergian uncertainty and will leave you a certain time to escape.

Hope these advices will be useful.
Happy intergalactic journey !

Early Art

Early Art

Example of a paleolithic painting found in the Lascaux caves. For some reasons, these paintings were never shown to the public.

Heads or Tails

Mother Nature gets 0/10 on this one

One day I found some sort of unidentified insect lying on its back in the kitchen. It was alive and was moving its legs frenetically, and had it been able to speak, would probably have been shouting 'Help ! Help !' After observing it for a while, and before the cat could come and have it for her snack, I helped the creature to get back on its feet. It then continued its journey for an unknown destination.
As far as I'm concerned, this case definately qualifies as a bug and I give 0/10 to Mother Nature for having produced an insect whose life can be terminated just because it fell on the wrong side.
Another worrying example of how imperfect our world is...

Damn Rats !

Rats have been around longer than homo sapiens sapiens. Of course we don't remember it and act as if we were alone on earth. Don't worry, at the rate at which we destroy the planet we'll indeed be all alone and there won't be anymore of these damn rats !
Here's some info about these nice little creatures

Flying to the moon

An undocumented attempt to go to the moon